I have a new boyfriend. We’ve been together for just about two months so everything is still rather new between us. With that being said we already had our first fights, arguments and cry sessions. Relationships are complicated in many ways. The boy mind doesn’t always get the girl mind and vice versa, past experiences with boyfriends can drag you down and remind you of bad stuff and because of that it can be hard to let go and just be happy in a new relationship. I made a lot of thinking about this subject because obviously I want the best relationship possible and I think the way I am acting in it is making it harder for me a lot of the time. Here is what I think about:
♥ Let go of the past
Bad experiences in the past can drag you down. Maybe your ex boyfriend cheated on you, lied to you or treated you badly. This was probably such a bad experience and so hurtful that it took a long time to get over it or maybe you haven’t fully gotten over it yet and your trust issues are still big. This can make a new relationship really complicated because you are sure that your new boyfriend will eventually treat you the same way. In order to be happy in your new relationship you have to let go of your past, move on and believe that just because you had bad experiences with boys in the past doesn’t mean that you will end up being lied to or cheated on again.
♥ Respect the boy’s way
Boys think differently than girls. This fact is probably one of the things that make relationships between girls and boys complicated. A good example could be that the boy wants to hang out with his friends for a night and he didn’t tell the girl beforehand so somehow she assumed that he was hanging out with her. A classic girl/boy misunderstanding. To avoid stupid fights like this always have in mind that most of the time guys don’t do stuff like this to upset the girls, they simply just don’t think about it. Let it go, respect that boys think differently than girls, learn his way and if things he does upsets you then tell him honestly, so he might get it and not do it again.
♥ Get to know each other and be honest
It is completely normal that the beginning of a new relationship is hard due to many reasons. You want to spend all of your time together, you get scared, you are in love and you get completely sucked in in a kind of trance. Everything is new and exciting and the only one you think about is him. Of course that is perfectly normal and fine, but on the other hand it is also important to remember your own life, habits and friends. Take your time to get to know each other, don’t rush anything and most importantly be honest. When the time is right, tell him about your expectations, what you want, how you are and how you act and react.
♥ It’s okay to miss each other. As stated above take your time and take it easy. Eventhough you probably feel like spending any possible second together it is essential that you don’t forget everything about your own habits, your tasks, your family and friends etc. Missing each other is a good thing and it also means you will value the time you have together more than if you spend every moment together.
♥ Stop picking fights
Maybe it is just me (I hope not) but it seems like I can make everything a reason to fight. It is so not worth it and so unnecessary. It takes two to tango, remember that you are two persons in a relationship and not only you. Remember to compromise. You can’t get everything your way and exactly how you want it, so stop picking the unnecessary fights. He didn’t leave the toilet seat up to piss you off, and instead of getting pissed off try telling him in a nice way that it would be great if he could put it down after him, and it might actually help! Good communication is important and most of the times it takes you further, than constantly being pissed about stupid, small stuff.
♥ Don’t overthink
Many girls overthink and have a hard time staying in the presence and feeling comfortable with in. Everything has to have a reason and everything needs to be planned and perfect. Thought like “what if I he is not the one?” or “what if I am just waisting my time” are not worth it. If you are happy with him right now, then let it be it. Go with the flow and remember you can’t predict life. Believe that things happen for a reason, especially if you always try to do your best. If you want it to work out it will and if not, you didn’t want it enough or it wasn’t meant to be.
♥ Try your best and hardest
This might be the key to a happy relationship. If you aim to be happy and make good decisions it will reflect on your relationship. Be the good girlfriend, be okay with your boyfriend if he wants to see his friends for a night, leave cute notes for him, give him a kiss when he doesn’t expect it or cook his favorite meal. It is the small stuff that counts, and everything is easier if you are happy.